I had a bad migraine over the weekend that simply took up all the space in my mind and body. I woke up with a break in the pain and a deep urge to throw myself into something that felt like momentum. I found myself awash in sadness. I couldn’t stop myself from crying. It […]
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Day 965 and Bounce Back
I had a really shitty day yesterday. I was attuned to the haunted corners in myself and others. I was in an astonishing amount of pain. I got into a fight with a family member over a misunderstanding. I found myself in a state of reactivity. It’s a huge challenge to manage nervous system regulation […]
Day 891 and All Alright
I am trying to practice detachment and still enjoy the present moment. A set of secondary side effects from an antibiotic are unpleasant in the extreme. But as the theme of throwback 90s hit “That 70’s Show” so effectively proclaims, “we’re all alright, we’re all alright!” While it is true that what is in our […]
Day 874 and Steady Hand
All the science fiction I read as a kid has been a great trial run for the current reality. We have synthetic selves, AI chatbots, embedded intelligence, and money run by a consortium of your peers. That’s not too shabby considering that my favorite utopian science fiction Star Trek depicted San Francisco as a crime […]
Day 862 and Separation
They say absence makes the heart grow fonder. But I don’t feel absence in my heart. And it certainly isn’t positive. If only absence were so tightly concentrated and concretely clear. I feel it in my entire body. And it’s painful. Perhaps it’s the new emotional attunement gained from my five week nervous system bootcamp […]